How’s everyone holdin' up? T3G's therapeutic mental health and general chat thread.

[mauriejess]

Happy Easter everyone! My Facebook reminded me that two years ago on lock down I had lost my mind and was going to let my dog drive my previous Tacoma.

Hope this brings some smiles to some faces

 

[Tyler]

Happy to anyone who does Easter things!

 

[solscooter]

Happy to anyone who does Easter things!

I’m drinking. I think that counts for any holiday

 

[solscooter]

Yesterday was national project semi colon day

Learn More About Project Semicolon Day - The Knockturnal

Project Semicolon Day, celebrated on April 16, encourages everybody to share their own stories of struggle and their…

theknockturnal.com

 

[bonifacio]

I’m drinking. I think that counts for any holiday

I'm never drinking again.

 

[mauriejess]

I'm never drinking again.

I keep telling myself that, then I did have a few drinks this weekend.. I am done with nicotine for good though that was a tough one to kick with vaping and the pouches.

 

[Meclizine]

I'm never drinking again.

I need to join you in that.

I keep telling myself that, then I did have a few drinks this weekend.. I am done with nicotine for good though that was a tough one to kick with vaping and the pouches.

Nice work! I hear nicotine is a really tough one

 

[Meclizine]

So, I'm diagnosed with dysthymic disorder, which seems to be the fibromyalgia of depression. Basically, I'm depressed almost all of the time and meds don't work well. With the help of docs I'm getting off my meds and will see about other treatments. For anyone who hasn't experienced depression, it's practically impossible to explain what this is like. Although I live on Earth, I feel like I'm on another planet. Sometimes I can't tell if I'm being crushed by reality or delusion.

Apologies if I've been unpleasant at all these last few weeks. Messing with serotonin has a lot of consequences and I've been calm like a bomb this week, though I think I've kept it under control.

 

[solscooter]

Going off medication is no joke. Hope whatever treatment you get works.

 

[B_Lui]

So, I'm diagnosed with dysthymic disorder, which seems to be the fibromyalgia of depression. Basically, I'm depressed almost all of the time and meds don't work well. With the help of docs I'm getting off my meds and will see about other treatments. For anyone who hasn't experienced depression, it's practically impossible to explain what this is like. Although I live on Earth, I feel like I'm on another planet. Sometimes I can't tell if I'm being crushed by reality or delusion.

Apologies if I've been unpleasant at all these last few weeks. Messing with serotonin has a lot of consequences and I've been calm like a bomb this week, though I think I've kept it under control.

Because I don't know, my questions/comments are from a purely caring, explorative, inquisitive, maybe/hopefully helpful place.

I don't want anyone to feel bad, it sucks. There was a time in my life I didn't want to get out of bed to begin my days. I knew at the time those days and it was because I didn't want to do a damn thing I knew I had to that day. Turns out I didn't "have" to, but that's what I thought at the time.

Sorry, I digress...when you come off the meds; do you think to the extent the meds worked that coming off them or to the end of a dose was a cause of an onset of more depression? Especially when dealing with the mind, do you feel the meds treated the symptom or the cause? I'm not a scientist, but I am aware that ours brains are unbelievably complicated with almost infinite number of chemical makeups and combinations.

I think talking and conversing does more healing than anyone gives it credit for. Being able to talk about anything openly (there IS a time and place for certain topics) is so freeing for the mind.

When you say you feel like you live on another planet, what is the context? What about the reality or delusion feels crushing?

 

[itsthex]

Depression is an ugly thing to have to deal with. Good look to you @Meclizine and additionally to anyone else who struggles with depression.

Personally, the end of last year was pretty rough for myself. In the end, it's all been for a positive end and I'm finally getting back on my feet and finding my motivation and desire to push on through my projects and continue my personal and professional growth. It took a while to work through the negativity and depressive anxiety that I was dealing with due to the circumstances I'd been faced with, but with perseverance and an outward-in viewpoint I was able to rationalize my feelings and though processes and realize what part I was playing in the daily doom-fest that was my life for the moment.

Things that would normally be negative for some people are what ultimately became my positive and allowed me to get back up on my feet. I was sidelined at work and bottlenecked from a new higher-up that eventually made me look bad and it led to that same higher-up being told to let me go. It was a disappointment because the company I was working for- prior to my employment there- was seemingly the perfect job to round out my career. Ultimately, once I was there I started seeing through the mirage and realized that was definitely not the case.

Long story short, losing that job helped me realize that I'm tired of trying to tell everyone else's story and/or helping make others visions come to life.

The time off since being let go (only my 2nd time ever being fired, honestly) back in November has been tough, with some pretty heavy relationship related stuff that has luckily cleared up, but has proven to be the ultimate tipping point to me truly getting in the direction I want to go.
Since November I have really buckled down and got my side business running into a full time business that brings in more than I was ever paid working for anyone else. Now, I'm a month away from the launch of my second business and have brought back love for some hobbies I had long forgotten and never had time for. I have too many projects to finish now but it's not a bad thing as they all have purpose and reason and make me excited to continue building and growing.

And, on that note, thats why I've been absent from these forums for a while. But now.. I'm back!

 

[Bird dog]

Depression is an ugly thing to have to deal with. Good look to you @Meclizine and additionally to anyone else who struggles with depression.

Personally, the end of last year was pretty rough for myself. In the end, it's all been for a positive end and I'm finally getting back on my feet and finding my motivation and desire to push on through my projects and continue my personal and professional growth. It took a while to work through the negativity and depressive anxiety that I was dealing with due to the circumstances I'd been faced with, but with perseverance and an outward-in viewpoint I was able to rationalize my feelings and though processes and realize what part I was playing in the daily doom-fest that was my life for the moment.

Things that would normally be negative for some people are what ultimately became my positive and allowed me to get back up on my feet. I was sidelined at work and bottlenecked from a new higher-up that eventually made me look bad and it led to that same higher-up being told to let me go. It was a disappointment because the company I was working for- prior to my employment there- was seemingly the perfect job to round out my career. Ultimately, once I was there I started seeing through the mirage and realized that was definitely not the case.

Long story short, losing that job helped me realize that I'm tired of trying to tell everyone else's story and/or helping make others visions come to life.

The time off since being let go (only my 2nd time ever being fired, honestly) back in November has been tough, with some pretty heavy relationship related stuff that has luckily cleared up, but has proven to be the ultimate tipping point to me truly getting in the direction I want to go.
Since November I have really buckled down and got my side business running into a full time business that brings in more than I was ever paid working for anyone else. Now, I'm a month away from the launch of my second business and have brought back love for some hobbies I had long forgotten and never had time for. I have too many projects to finish now but it's not a bad thing as they all have purpose and reason and make me excited to continue building and growing.

And, on that note, thats why I've been absent from these forums for a while. But now.. I'm back!

Welcome back, glad to hear that you are doing better. They say that the difference between adventure and adversity is attitude. They also say it builds character, but who the hell wants to be a character. Glad you’re doing well!

 

[mauriejess]

So, I'm diagnosed with dysthymic disorder, which seems to be the fibromyalgia of depression. Basically, I'm depressed almost all of the time and meds don't work well. With the help of docs I'm getting off my meds and will see about other treatments. For anyone who hasn't experienced depression, it's practically impossible to explain what this is like. Although I live on Earth, I feel like I'm on another planet. Sometimes I can't tell if I'm being crushed by reality or delusion.

Apologies if I've been unpleasant at all these last few weeks. Messing with serotonin has a lot of consequences and I've been calm like a bomb this week, though I think I've kept it under control.

If you ever need someone to question how they are dosing your meds I'm your gal! Coming off them can be tricky but there is a right way, everyone is different and there are things that can also help (been there, struggle bussed through it but been there)

Depression is a MF'R! I'm struggling right now with it on and off but there's only one way from rock bottom and it's UP! I always tell myself that and I've made it this far in life for a reason.

The greatest thing is you got an answer, a diagnosis and not too many people actually get that - which the end result is a general blanket approach with meds and ceiling dosing and changing them every couple years because they stop working.

 

[bonifacio]

Good to hear you guys are doing well. One of the reasons why I disappear for a bit and resurface. Keep it pushing through. Just wish there would be an absolute.

 

[itsthex]

If you ever need someone to question how they are dosing your meds I'm your gal! Coming off them can be tricky but there is a right way, everyone is different and there are things that can also help (been there, struggle bussed through it but been there)

Depression is a MF'R! I'm struggling right now with it on and off but there's only one way from rock bottom and it's UP! I always tell myself that and I've made it this far in life for a reason.

The greatest thing is you got an answer, a diagnosis and not too many people actually get that - which the end result is a general blanket approach with meds and ceiling dosing and changing them every couple years because they stop working.

Good to hear you guys are doing well. One of the reasons why I disappear for a bit and resurface. Keep it pushing through. Just wish there would be an absolute.

Keep your heads up guys.. Depression sucks but you can conquer it and we are all rooting for you.

 

[TCOTUE]

I've lost a few friends to depression. Both were veterans, and I always feel like I never reached out enough.

In light of recent events, I am 1 appointment down from being listed on the transplant list. I have a physic eval from a VA doc pending next week. Should that go in my favor I could listed as early as mid next week.

For those new to my situation, I'm in Stage 5 kidney failure, on dialysis. Also I a type 1 diabetic. I'm attempted to get a pancreas and kidney transplant. The nervousness is setting in. My wife is super nervous.

Good news on her dad. Back story, he's in his 70's very unstable on his feet. Last sept fell in his house going to check on his wife during a storm. Broke his neck, lost all feeling from neck down and is now a quad. He's been in Lincoln since Oct, 2 week ago his condition worsened and they moved him from the rehab hospital to a actual hospital. Turns out he has pretty aggressive bone marrow cancer. They finally air evac'd him back to his home hospital. We hadn't seen him since Christmas. Now my wife goes everyday to see him. Not sure how much longer he'll be with us, but he's not ready to give up. My wife needs thoughts/prayers as shes dealing with both of our situations. Not to mention her grandma was diagnosed with bladder cancer, but they think it's treatable. It just never stops in our household, hoping for good news next week.

TLDR: fuck cancer.

 

[Mike_570]

I've lost a few friends to depression. Both were veterans, and I always feel like I never reached out enough.

In light of recent events, I am 1 appointment down from being listed on the transplant list. I have a physic eval from a VA doc pending next week. Should that go in my favor I could listed as early as mid next week.

For those new to my situation, I'm in Stage 5 kidney failure, on dialysis. Also I a type 1 diabetic. I'm attempted to get a pancreas and kidney transplant. The nervousness is setting in. My wife is super nervous.

Good news on her dad. Back story, he's in his 70's very unstable on his feet. Last sept fell in his house going to check on his wife during a storm. Broke his neck, lost all feeling from neck down and is now a quad. He's been in Lincoln since Oct, 2 week ago his condition worsened and they moved him from the rehab hospital to a actual hospital. Turns out he has pretty aggressive bone marrow cancer. They finally air evac'd him back to his home hospital. We hadn't seen him since Christmas. Now my wife goes everyday to see him. Not sure how much longer he'll be with us, but he's not ready to give up. My wife needs thoughts/prayers as shes dealing with both of our situations. Not to mention her grandma was diagnosed with bladder cancer, but they think it's treatable. It just never stops in our household, hoping for good news next week.

TLDR: fuck cancer.

Hey man, listen. It's respectable to wish you'd have reached out more, but at the end of the day when someone makes that decision, they've simply made that decision and no amount of support or love can help.

I lost a friend of mine for the same reason - talked just about every day and spent plenty of late nights staying up with him to talk, try to help and support him. At the end of the day, the decision that he made was going to be made regardless of anything I tried to do. It's easy to feel like you didn't do enough but sometimes there's nothing you can do.

Fuck cancer indeed, my friend, I'm truly sorry to hear about the health issues you're going through and I hope you're able to get your transplants soon. I can't even begin to imagine the anxiety that you must feel. I will keep you, and your family, in my thoughts.

 

[DavidLReid]

I've lost a few friends to depression. Both were veterans, and I always feel like I never reached out enough.

In light of recent events, I am 1 appointment down from being listed on the transplant list. I have a physic eval from a VA doc pending next week. Should that go in my favor I could listed as early as mid next week.

For those new to my situation, I'm in Stage 5 kidney failure, on dialysis. Also I a type 1 diabetic. I'm attempted to get a pancreas and kidney transplant. The nervousness is setting in. My wife is super nervous.

Good news on her dad. Back story, he's in his 70's very unstable on his feet. Last sept fell in his house going to check on his wife during a storm. Broke his neck, lost all feeling from neck down and is now a quad. He's been in Lincoln since Oct, 2 week ago his condition worsened and they moved him from the rehab hospital to a actual hospital. Turns out he has pretty aggressive bone marrow cancer. They finally air evac'd him back to his home hospital. We hadn't seen him since Christmas. Now my wife goes everyday to see him. Not sure how much longer he'll be with us, but he's not ready to give up. My wife needs thoughts/prayers as shes dealing with both of our situations. Not to mention her grandma was diagnosed with bladder cancer, but they think it's treatable. It just never stops in our household, hoping for good news next week.

TLDR: fuck cancer.

I am sorry about the health issues facing your family. Thoughts and prayers for you and your family.

 

[Bird dog]

Thoughts and prayers Brother.

 

[itsthex]

I've lost a few friends to depression. Both were veterans, and I always feel like I never reached out enough.

In light of recent events, I am 1 appointment down from being listed on the transplant list. I have a physic eval from a VA doc pending next week. Should that go in my favor I could listed as early as mid next week.

For those new to my situation, I'm in Stage 5 kidney failure, on dialysis. Also I a type 1 diabetic. I'm attempted to get a pancreas and kidney transplant. The nervousness is setting in. My wife is super nervous.

Good news on her dad. Back story, he's in his 70's very unstable on his feet. Last sept fell in his house going to check on his wife during a storm. Broke his neck, lost all feeling from neck down and is now a quad. He's been in Lincoln since Oct, 2 week ago his condition worsened and they moved him from the rehab hospital to a actual hospital. Turns out he has pretty aggressive bone marrow cancer. They finally air evac'd him back to his home hospital. We hadn't seen him since Christmas. Now my wife goes everyday to see him. Not sure how much longer he'll be with us, but he's not ready to give up. My wife needs thoughts/prayers as shes dealing with both of our situations. Not to mention her grandma was diagnosed with bladder cancer, but they think it's treatable. It just never stops in our household, hoping for good news next week.

TLDR: fuck cancer.

Stay strong brother, this is truly a tough situation. Fuck cancer for sure. You will beat this shit!

 

[Tyler]

Man. I’ve been feeling like crap. Hope you guys and the forum have been well.

 

[B-Man]

All well here.......hope you get to feelin' better!

 

[Tyler]

I've lost a few friends to depression. Both were veterans, and I always feel like I never reached out enough.

In light of recent events, I am 1 appointment down from being listed on the transplant list. I have a physic eval from a VA doc pending next week. Should that go in my favor I could listed as early as mid next week.

For those new to my situation, I'm in Stage 5 kidney failure, on dialysis. Also I a type 1 diabetic. I'm attempted to get a pancreas and kidney transplant. The nervousness is setting in. My wife is super nervous.

Good news on her dad. Back story, he's in his 70's very unstable on his feet. Last sept fell in his house going to check on his wife during a storm. Broke his neck, lost all feeling from neck down and is now a quad. He's been in Lincoln since Oct, 2 week ago his condition worsened and they moved him from the rehab hospital to a actual hospital. Turns out he has pretty aggressive bone marrow cancer. They finally air evac'd him back to his home hospital. We hadn't seen him since Christmas. Now my wife goes everyday to see him. Not sure how much longer he'll be with us, but he's not ready to give up. My wife needs thoughts/prayers as shes dealing with both of our situations. Not to mention her grandma was diagnosed with bladder cancer, but they think it's treatable. It just never stops in our household, hoping for good news next week.

TLDR: fuck cancer.

Just read this one - didn’t mean to draw away from it.

You and your wife stay strong.

And yes - fuck cancer. Fuck dementia too.

 

[TCOTUE]

Just read this one - didn’t mean to draw away from it.

You and your wife stay strong.

And yes - fuck cancer. Fuck dementia too.

We are doing ok right now. Just the anxiety or fear of the unknown is what we are struggling with.

On her dad's front, yesterday was a real bad day. His heart stopped twice yesterday and the Dr asked for family to come to the hospital. He's still alive and here today, although from what I've heard he's not mentally here. Stopping by after work to visit and show support. I think my wife has come to terms that her dad will never be the same, which is unfortunate. She has expressed that she just doesn't want him to live out his last days in pain.

Thanks again to EVERYONE in this community. I've said it before, it's nice to come to a place and not be ridiculed for having open feelings. This truly is a safe environment to vent. That being said, sometimes I hate coming in here to vent. I'm not generally a negative person, but it seems life has other plans.

I'm positive I'm scared to death of what the future holds for me. But excited in the same respect.

I actually ran into someone yesterday with an Organ Donor license plate of KDNYLFE, and stopped her at Walmart. She gave me some hope on recovery times, and over all how I'm going to feel. As for me that was a huge unknown, but she eased my mind on. We exchanged infomation, and she said to text her anytime. Unfortunately for her instance, she was in organ rejection. So she's getting back on the transplant list. I just thought it was crazy running into someone else with the exact same prognosis.

 

[solscooter]

I’d be anxious as hell too. You got this

 

[Tyler]

Does anyone think they have, or know they have, ADHD?

 

[Mike_570]

Does anyone think they have, or know they have, ADHD?

I haven't been on much recently I've been going through some nasty shit lately. I handed my guns over to a buddy of mine for safe keeping...not because I actively want to do anything but I got to the point where I felt like "I truly don't know how much longer I can handle this" and that was enough for me to be concerned about doing something stupid in a moment of depression mixed with irrationality which for me unfortunately tend to go hand-in-hand. This prompted me to (as much as I didn't like the idea of it) start seeing a psychologist who deemed me messed up enough to start seeing a psychiatrist.

Within the first appointment they diagnosed me with dysthymia (chronic depression ) and said I also seem to show clear signs of having ADD. Somehow this is just being recognized after 27 years...so I have to get tested now to see if I do. I've honestly wondered about it considering I struggle very much to focus on and do things that I don't want to do but if I'm interested in doing even the most boring of tasks I can get it done just fine. There's a few others reasons as well, but basically - I've had my suspicions and it seems that I wasn't far off based off of what they are suggesting may be wrong with me.

 

[Smitty]

Does anyone think they have, or know they have, ADHD?

Oh I 100% have it. Diagnosed and everything. I used to take meds when I was younger for it but it gave me really bad anxiety and made my depression worse. I was always super quiet and shy, never talked unless I had to talk. Eventually I stopped taking it (mainly cause I hate pills in general) and just learned how to control it when I need to focus. Every now and then it's hard to focus, especially at work... My grades got (somewhat) better, made a lot of friends, etc. I've noticed when I get really stressed out (which is all the time at this point...) my "ADHD kicks in" as I call it and I can't focus. I'll go from one thing to another faster than a blink of an eye. One second I'll be talking about, Idk lets say the Bruins game and how they lost to Carolina when they shouldn't of been knocked out of the playoffs... then I'll see like a nice car drive by (like a Charger or another nice Taco or something) and I'll switch my focus on that, completely disregarding hockey in general. It's been getting a lot worse lately.. Bad enough where I'm starting to get memory issues. Like I'd remember talking about the Bruins then go back to that topic, but now, it seems like I forget the entire conversation and just repeat everything over again. At least that's what my gf started to notice..

 

[Meclizine]

Within the first appointment they diagnosed me with dysthymia (chronic depression )

Ah, man. Welcome to the club. Five medications later and I'm convinced they don't work for me. Good on you for recognizing that you might not be very safe with firearms around the house, many people aren't that self-aware. That's certainly one reason I don't have any, but then I've got a collection of knives and regularly use potassium cyanide for work and hobby, so I'm still surrounded by those permanent "solutions" to a temporary problem. The real issue is it can feel like a permanent problem, which really lowers the bar when it comes finding a solution to the depression.

I'm still feeling the effects of going off my meds a few weeks ago (antidepressant withdrawal syndrome). Don't worry, this was under medical supervision with a titration schedule and everything. But coming down from a very high dose is a rough ride. I'm still having brain zaps but my mood is stabilizing and I have an appetite again. I'm riding my bike to work and focusing on hobbies to boost my mood and I'll see how this goes. But I'm certain that for me, being on meds is more of a liability. At best I feel the side effects, and at worst withdrawal if I miss a dose. It just wasn't worth it. After I ride this out I'm going to look into TMS as it's the only intervention that holds promise for me, but it's relatively new for this and I'm hoping my insurance covers it.

Mike, hang in there. Depression is one of those things that's easily invisible if someone wants it to be. Honestly, the one thing depression taught me was how to hide it. Not a good thing.

 

[Lava road]

3 books that change my life. Old but the principles still works today!
1st- “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living “. By Dale Carnegie
2nd- “ How to Win Friends and Influence People” By Dale Carnegie
3rd- “Think and Grow Rich” By Napoleon Hill

Lonely, Depressed, Poor, all is a frame of mind.
I don’t make many promises, but “I Promise you if read these books, re-read them till you understand it!
It will change your life. I did for me.
Aloha